i'm impossible to forget, but i'm hard to remember.

by - 3:41 AM

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What they say is, it will hit you, it could be ten minutes or it could be ten years from now.

My dearest blue-eyed boy,

I miss you.
A whole freaking lot.
I thought about you all day yesterday.
But you know this. Because I can tell you.

I miss being able to depend on someone {anyone} like I've been able to depend on you.
You've seen so many ups and downs, good times and bad.
A thousand smiles and even a few tears.
You've helped to mend broken hearts, solved a million problems, and taken care of me when I was sick.
Through countless nights of laughter, deep talks, big decisions, dinner runs, and life changing events ...
you were my companion.
There was never the awkward strain or any kind of unfortunate emotional distance.
You were my best friend {my favorite friend} the one I missed most when we began growing up.
Even if you were only 25 minutes away ... we seemed a world apart.


Our (long standing) chat dates.
Actually, all those real dates, too.
Strawberry Limeaids.
Long drives.
Good, good food.
Crazy adventures.
Stargazing and camping.
Your faithful attempts to teach me to fish.

And to make the perfect s'more.
Lots of laughing.
Movie after movie.
And walk after walk.

{sigh.}
It was completely comfortable.
Friends of the best kind.
Comfortable-even-in-the-silence-friends.


You took off a whole day for me.
I don't think that clicked until yesterday.
You took off an entire work day for me.Off your grown-up job.
Without me asking.
Wow. You are fantastic.

I have always loved you.
Completely. Like your favorite friend in kindergarten.
The one you trade your pudding with.
Even if it's your favorite.
Since the moment we, with twinkling mischievous eyes, plotted our first adventure.
I want you around for many years to come.
As my best friend. Again.
I want this friendship to ignite once more to that degree.
It is you, my wonderful rhyming friend, that I look to as the drawing board of what I want for my future.


Fondest Regards,

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